I woke up today and did not want to practice. Well, I wanted to practice. But at the same time I did not. I wrestled with it. Should I practice? Should I not practice? I asked the cat for his opinion but instead of answering he bit my hand. The minutes ticked away -- precious minutes that could have been spent practicing. Why do I hate to practice and yet love to practice? Why don't I practice more? I only practiced four times this week. What is my problem? Why am I making so little progress in my....
Oh wait, that's someone else's blog.
But I did only do four asana pratices this week.
That's because I fell ill on Wednesday with fever, nausea and extreme exhaustion. Still, I got up in time to imbibe some chai before the phone interview with Radio Austria. I sounded like a nincompoop anyway.
Afterwards I set a bucket next to the bed -- just in case -- and went back down for a nap.
I awakened feeling worse.
"My life is a mess," I thought. "What in the hell am I doing?"
So I did the only thing I could: I watched State Fair, which featured Ann-Margaret, Bobby Darin and Pat Boone (I was not so ill that I failed to notice what a hot body Boone had. Yes, Pat Boone was hot.). I actually enjoyed it -- especially when the father wielded a big piece of plywood to herd his beloved pet pig in front of the fair judges -- and it won grand champion. I too showed Hampshire* pigs when I was in 4-H, using a green piece of plywood with our club name stencilled on it to keep the swine between me and the judge. I won grand champion gilt and reserve champion litter (a litter is three siblings). As Xmas Judy correctly pointed out, "It was only because your father did all the work."
(I think that was the only time, post-divorce, that I was the beneficiary of such favoritism).
Later, my younger stepbrother and I cried when we found out they were auctioning off our pigs to buyers who planned to bar-b-que them. Sobbing, we went to the swine barn and said a long goodbye to our pigs, and told them we were sorry.
You see, I was doing yoga even back then....
But I digress.
After the movie and trip down memory lane I still felt like crap.
So I canceled the only private lesson I have.
I found a sub for my evening class.
Then I proceeded to drink ginger ale, eat crackers in bed, and sleep.
(You should always keep ginger ale in the house, by the way. And eat crackers in bed).
In the evening I watched Say Anything. It was the first time I'd seen it from start to finish.
It was, like, the best movie ever.
Afterwards I watched Lost, which sucked, and then went back to dreamland.
The sleep cure worked; the next day I taught four classes like it was nothing.
Well, I did battle some nausea during the first one, and tried to focus on the less strenuous poses.
And I was utterly exhausted.
So between each class I came home and took a nap.
And today I woke up and.... started in on Surya Namaskar A!
But I was weak and my sinuses were a mess (the weather just went from 70 and humid to 30 and dry, creating a barometic teeter-totter for the sinuses). Plus my back was killing me.
Instead of bailing, I addressed it in my practice.
I did kapalabathi and alternate nostril breathing.
I did headstand.
I did some twists and other asanas for the back.
Then I did the fundamental standing asanas, followed by backbends and savasana.
It worked; I felt better.
I went forth and taught, and it was good.
Well, at least *I* thought it was.
*Hampshire pigs are black with a thick white stripe.